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Hummer - The Car People Love to Hate

GM just announced that, due to the high price of gas as well as the consumer demand, they will be shifting their focus to smaller, more fuel efficient vehicles (FINALLY). Of all the large vehicles they produce, the Hummer brand has to be one of their most famous (or infamous depending on how you look at it).

The Hummer has to be one of the most loved and most hated cars on the market today. It is the car that big car people love and the epitome of evil for the more environmentally conscious consumers. It used to be that Hummers were rare, if you saw one on the street you stopped and stared and told your friends about it the next day in 1st period. As the Hummer brand grew in popularity, they revamped it, creating the H2 (a clear status symbol), and later brought out a smaller, cheaper H3 (to make the Hummer brand more affordable to the rest of the population. Hummers now are pretty common (at least in southern California) and buying one is no longer a challenge (just filling up the gas tank is).

With the falling sales, GM had made plans to move the Hummer in a more "green" direction but are now reconsidering and deciding if they might want to sell it instead. I say going green is not the answer. GM does not have it in them to make a truly green Hummer. The Hummer Brand has too strong of emotions tied to it, the tree huggers will never buy a Hummer and the Hummer drivers will never go green. Allow me to take of my environmentalist hat off for a minute and make a suggestion.

GM will take a massive hit if the sell Hummer (and that's if they can find a buyer) so I think they should take Hummer to the ultimate extreme. Take Hummer back to when you would RARELY see one on the street so that when it passes by, everyone stops to stare. Redesign Hummer so it looks more like the old hummer, harsher lines but a modern look (the new ones look plastic).

Make one version of the Hummer and make it HUGE. Make it so big that the valet has no option but to park it right in front of the valet booth, eclipsing customers as they pick up their car. Hand build each Hummer from the ground up so that they are limited in production. Put an engine in that would make the corvette jealous and give it the ability to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro. Don't just put Bose in the cabin, put it on the suspension too.

As far as the inside, make the Maybach Jealous. The controls in the car should all be illuminated touch screens (no more buttons and dials and forget the i-drive). The car should talk with you, not too you, and the speech should sound like a person, not a robot. Put hand stitched leather seats in the back that vibrate, recline, rotate, heat and serve cappuccino. The sound system should make the accoustic designers of the Walt Disney Concert Hall wonder if they are in the right profession. Give it enough leg room in the back to stand up an pace around. Attach your laptop to the dock and use the 30" HD screen in front of you to do your work with the high speed mobile internet so that you are always connected. The car should be fun to drive but even nicer to be escorted in.

I don't believe the Hummer's image can be salvaged at this point, so why not just exacerbate it? This isn't the Hummer for the OC soccer mom anymore, this is the Hummer that the prince of Dubai drives out of town guests around in. This is the Hummer that no longer sits next to the Mustang GT, this Hummer sits next to the Enzo. Instead of changing the car, Hummer can change its market. These ridiculously priced, limited run cars often lose money but considering the amount of money GM is losing on them now, and the jobs they have to cut because of it, it might not seem like such a bad idea.